Attachment Counseling In-Person in Madison & Online Across Wisconsin

Strengthen connections &

rediscover trust.

Relationships can be confusing, turbulent, and exhausting.

Whether it’s with a romantic partner, family member, friend, or colleague, it might seem like you can never get things “right.” Especially amid conflict, you find yourself reacting in ways that don’t reflect how you actually feel, but you don’t know how to slow down enough in the moment to respond differently. You might blame this on the idea that there’s something “wrong” with you. But the fact is, many of the ideas we have about relationships and our role in them form early in childhood—which is not your fault.

MAYBE It feels like…

  • You keep repeating the same fights or having the same problems in your relationships

  • It’s difficult to trust or feel safe with others, or even to trust your own judgment or intuition

  • Your worth is determined or defined by whether you meet the expectations of others

  • Intimacy with a romantic partner is difficult, or you use it to numb yourself rather than feel close

  • You lose yourself completely in relationships or push others away before it gets to that point

  • It’s hard to accept, receive, or give apologies

  • You can’t ask for what you want or need in relationships

  • Certain topics of conversation are too hard to talk about, and you get easily irritated when they come up or avoid them entirely

  • They might have difficulty adjusting to changes like a loss, separation, new sibling, or moving households. They could also be regressing in their behavior—not expressing themselves the same way they used to or doing tasks you know they’re capable of. It may be difficult to support them through these big feelings and challenges, but you’re not alone, and seeking help through counseling is the best thing you can do for them and yourself.

    Several therapists on our team specialize in working with children. You can learn more about our therapists and their approaches to therapy on our About page.

Relationships can’t be perfect, but they can be better.

Helping you heal from the past, break cycles, and set boundaries.

Attachment theory has become more recognized by non-therapists in recent years, and you might have even seen a video on social media describing things like “anxious” or “avoidant” attachment styles. This can be helpful for understanding where some of your reactions or behaviors in relationships are rooted—often in early childhood—but can also make you feel like you’re stuck being pigeonholed as that attachment style. Let us assure you that you are not defined by your attachment in relationships and, through therapy, there is absolutely flexibility for change.

When you begin working with a therapist, you’ll not only have the space to talk about and work through what’s going on in your relationships currently but also to connect the dots of how these experiences relate to ones from your past. You’ll start to notice patterns, and your therapist can help you explore new ways of approaching things like conflict resolution or communicating your needs so that you don’t continue to repeat them in the future. You’ll also learn tools to help you regulate your emotions independently, because attachment is just as much about your ability to function as an individual who’s comfortable in their own skin as it is about relationships with others.

If you’re a parent or your child is the one in therapy, you and your therapist may go over things like how to regulate your own emotions in difficult conversations or situations. This can be helpful for modeling calm behavior to your child and feeling confident in your connection with them.

Through all of this, you’ll realize that any issues you have with attachment aren’t an inherent fault of yours—they’re coping skills you developed in response to an unhealthy dynamic early in life. You’ll recognize that you did what you needed to do to feel safe in those formative years, and can now grow into new ways of engaging in relationships—with others and with yourself—that better suit who you are now.

Some methods our therapists use include…

  • A type of therapy that helps people process and heal from traumatic memories by using bilateral stimulation (like eye movements) to activate the brain's natural healing mechanisms.

  • An approach that frames the mind as a system of various parts, each with its own unique qualities and outlook. Through this, you can learn to accept and appreciate every part of yourself, and how to live in harmony with all of them.

  • A method that encourages individuals to accept their thoughts and feelings, fostering mindfulness, and then commit to actions aligned with their values to improve overall well-being.

  • Helps people, especially children, cope with and overcome the effects of trauma by combining talk therapy techniques with trauma-sensitive approaches.

  • Combines talk therapy techniques with mindfulness to help individuals regulate emotions, improve relationships, and develop healthy coping mechanisms.

  • A type of therapy that uses play and creative activities to help children express their thoughts and emotions in a safe and supportive environment, which improves communication and promotes emotional healing.

Therapy for Attachment can help you…

  • Feel more positive about life & the future

  • Navigate conflicts & repair connections after conflict

  • Know what you value in relationships

  • Set boundaries & respect the boundaries of others

  • Have confidence in your ability to communicate & make decisions

  • Have the tools to regulate your own emotions & manage anxiety

Embrace healthier relationships & a happier you.

Frequently Asked Questions

  • Yes, attachment styles can change over time—they're kind of like habits. With the insights and self-awareness you’ll gain through therapy and the new skills you’ll be able to implement in your life, you can shift toward more secure attachments.

  • Attachment style tends to set the tone for how you connect with others. If it's secure, relationships tend to be more stable. Anxious or avoidant styles might bring up some challenges, but self-awareness, boundaries, and communication—all of which you’ll learn and practice in therapy—can help navigate through them.

  • There are mainly four attachment styles—secure, anxious, avoidant, and disorganized. Each style has its own way of approaching relationships, and just because you identify with one doesn’t mean you can’t change or shift away from that style through conscious effort.

  • Anxious attachment often stems from early experiences where caregivers were inconsistent. Healing involves building trust in relationships, recognizing patterns, and working on self-soothing techniques. Therapy is a safe space to gain helpful insights and practice these techniques.

  • Avoidant attachment often develops when someone learns to rely on themselves due to inconsistent caregiving early in life. Therapy is a great first step toward healing, because it encourages opening up, building trust, and understanding that vulnerability is okay.