Internal Family Systems Therapy In-Person in Madison & Online Across Wisconsin

Understand & embrace

every part of you.

Sometimes, our reactions or feelings don’t always make sense to us in the context of the present.

If you’ve ever had mixed feelings about something, or felt like there were parts of you that you needed to hide from others, you know how confusing it can be to feel grounded in who you actually are. The truth is that each of us is made up of a lifetime of experiences at different stages, and those versions of ourselves still have a say in how we view and interpret the world around us. 

Having conflicting, or even opposite feelings about things is a normal experience. Internal Family Systems (IFS)—also referred to as “parts work”—can help us connect to the different parts and versions of ourselves that are feeling these things, and have more understanding and compassion for them.

MAYBE YOU’ve experienced…

  • Feeling like there are “dark”, “bad”, or “broken” parts of you that others don’t see or understand

  • Feeling shame or guilt after acting or not acting a certain way

  • Avoiding situations that feel like they might be too overwhelming

  • Difficult things in childhood, and want to understand how they affect you now

  • Communication issues with a partner—like blowing up during arguments, or avoiding conflict altogether

  • Taking things personally that you logically know have nothing to do with you

  • Not knowing why you get so angry or sad about certain things or in interactions with others

  • Feeling numb or nothing

IFS promotes healing that goes beyond talk therapy, so you can take back control of your life.

The idea of separating your inner self into parts may seem weird, but it’s science.

And it might not be as foreign to you as it initially sounds. Many of us have found ourselves saying things like “Part of me wants one thing, but another part of me wants the opposite.” This is the basis of parts work.

In this work, your therapist would prompt you to identify these two opposing parts of yourself. They might show up as younger versions of yourself, abstract colors or patterns, physical sensations, thoughts, ideas, or feelings.  Once you’ve identified these parts, you can open up a dialogue with them and begin to understand their motives behind what they’ve been communicating to you.

Because our present selves are informed by our past experiences, we may have developed behaviors or reactions over time that have become habitual—we do them without even thinking about it. When we slow down to understand the reasoning behind these habits, and where they came from, we can find common ground with the parts of ourselves that developed them to keep us safe.

This will not only help you to have more compassion for yourself, but also to live in harmony with all of your parts, and create real changes in both your internal and external lives. Because once you’ve opened up that dialogue with yourself, you’ll have a voice to assure the parts that may be interfering with your life that you have things under control.

IFS is a wonderful tool that can be helpful for many people and can be used with adults, teens, and children. Many of the therapists here at Reflections do parts work with their own therapists, and will be able to use that firsthand experience to help guide you through the work you’ll do together.

Internal Family Systems therapy can help with…

  • Understanding emotions & reactions

  • Improving mood & relationships

  • Healing your inner child & cultivating resilience

  • Feeling grounded in the present

  • Self-awareness & compassion

  • Feeling connected to all parts of yourself

It’s time to give your whole self the space to be.

Frequently Asked Questions

  • Yes, IFS is now classified as an evidence-based practice in the US. It has been declared effective for general functioning and wellbeing, and promising for a variety of more specific things like phobias, anxiety disorders, and depression.

  • IFS is used for various issues like anxiety, depression, trauma, and relationship problems. It can be helpful for these because it allows the client to see their mind as a family of different parts, each with its own perspective and role.

  • In Internal Family Systems, there are many different parts, such as the "exiles" that hold painful memories, the "managers" that try to control and avoid those feelings, the "firefighters" that react impulsively, and more. The goal is to understand and harmonize these parts for better mental well-being.